The Luminary Postgraduate Magazine Lancaster University

Formation of a Different Medium of Perception

Fatemeh Takhtkeshian


This series: ‘Ego ideal’ arises from my experience of trying to run away from parts of my life by abolishing all pictures or anything that reminded me of those days. In the process of destroying and tearing apart photographs that caused me shame or anger, surprisingly I discovered ways to see these experiences differently. Not hating them anymore, I decided to keep those pictures and use them in my painting and collage pieces. As a base for the new works, I used a second-hand book as sheets of paper, filled with the previous owner’s dreams and ideas. On top of these I added my own dreams, nightmares and life experiences. Using second-hand paper is like sleeping in the other person’s bed (room) and seeing their dreams start to enter in our nightlife; like borrowing part of someone’s soul. In this project I drown in my real life, dreams and nightmares until it is impossible for me to make a clear boundary between them. My ‘Ego Ideal’ is lost somewhere between those layers.
However, we are what we represent: a careful or careless selection of different layers. Our everyday lives are composed of movements back and forth behind the scenes and the stage where we present our ‘selves’. Society does not provide us with clear in­structions of how to act. Indirectly, society confines and forms us through a process of representation, mediated by language and other symbolizing systems. These systems, historically, construct and at the same time confine our experience of forming our ‘Ego Ideal’.





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